Breaking out? Breaking Bad?...Breaking

“We are what we repeatedly do.” ~Aristotle

That holds so true. I have become so routine I can go through my day in my sleep. As in, I will wake up uh-hm freshen the kids and I, get breakfast done and served and on.. (you get the drill) And I can do this with a blindfold.
That is just so wrong- It's a small wonder I've not yet grown mold. What with the stagnancy and all.
I officially add another year to my collection in a couple of days. And I got thinking.. you know how one goes down that melancholy road when the year is coming to an end? You get all serious, sentimental and everything bright and futuristic. Well, yes, I am at that place. Reviewed my life as was, is and how I want it to be.

Life has been good to me. Really good. It has placed friends in my life. People I would not replace even though I had all artillery from the Gaza strip pointing at me. People like +Onadit (hey man, sorry but I just can't get over your selflessness). I got quite a list of them great people walking around in my heart, or rather they have me playing resident in their hearts and they've never charged me rent and aren't about to. Well, MOK if you think of asking for rent, Bambi I will report you to that footballer guy and ask him to take his name back. :D

In its goodness however, I have created and thereby settled in some zones. Zones that make life so predictable- so routine and almost so boring. I know routines sometimes breed security. I know that.
However, last night, on impulse I went to a show where my Little Sister was singing and her friends were showcasing their fashion lines. So, I got there, sat down and settled with my phone at a table and chatted away with friends on the phone.. very anti-social right? I had people all around me but I kept talking to people through this small item in hand.

Until my sister walked back to me and introduced herself and I to all the people around us and even the ones on the next table!! You should have seen me! I wanted to die..OK, maybe not die but kind of disappear!
But I lived through it. Managed to make small talk.

Then I shared my experience with 'my chat buddy' and they were like.. true! you should break the routine. Do something different for your new year... This is what they said:

"i don't care if u walk naked steal a car or something like that just break the cycle"

Extreme? huh? Yep. But it got my adrenaline up and doing things.. oh well, in my mind at least. Because when life-time Crush Maurice Kirya

This Guy..hm!

 When that Maurice guy came on stage all I could do was lift my small phone and manage a few shots. Even when my bubbly companion managed to get a pass backstage (OK- she had a pass since she'd performed) and asked me to tag along for a selfie...or something..anything that would lay my life-long crush to rest... I simply cowed further down in my seat!! So much for breaking free!!!! One day though, I will do something crazy. something out of routine.
Got a few thoughts.. and will do them. Give me some ideas of what I could do different. Anything you'd like to see someone else try out for you- apart from committing suicide... Because Suicide hates me.

And then, this morning routine breaks out again. Start the day normally, go through the usual, Mummy can i have more toothpaste and all and then I check my Facebook news-feed. It was a random itch that sent me checking Facebook.

On it was this Chilling  report of Juliana's Son's Demise. No mother...no parent and absolutely no one (apart from the warlords- but those are not people.. they don't count as people in my world)... No one would want to place their little one in a little coffin. When they are oh so little.
And then again, I ask myself why? Why now? Why does this happen? Why do we fall in love only to lose it? I can not begin to imagine what she is going through right now..but I can't help the tears that keep rolling every time I imagine the little coffins floating all over our land.

My prayer this day today, is for every parent, family member and every one who has lost a family member to find strength in the promise that they've gone to a better life. That they are free from the pains and limitations of the physical body. That they have found peace. and that One Day, someday, when we too leave this ugly world, we'll be re-united. 

 May their Little Souls Rest in Peace.

So, my birthday is still on in a couple of days.I have no plans for that day. Might not even make that order for the once a year cake indulgence. All in the spirit of breaking routine. I will not do cake for me this year..come to think of it, no more birthday cakes at my house- We are breaking routine.. (did i get it wrong?)

And no resolutions either. Life is perfect as is. A few ripples here and there. I will not be here longer. Because I ain't growing any younger. so, instead of learning a new sport or spending time making new friends or hanging out at a bar/dance-hall.. I will concentrate on strengthening the relationships I have right now.
If perchance a new person walks into my life right now however, I will not turn them away.

We'll break the routine when it becomes very bad. Or when the routine wants to break up with me.

This week, we'll concentrate on celebrating the ones we have in our lives right now. Grateful for each and every single click i get on my blog. And as I turn yet another year, I will celebrate each and everyone of you.
Readers from where ever you read from. I appreciate you very much.

Thank you for being there. Thank you for standing my Jumbled thoughts and keep coming back for more.

Much Love

Happy birthday to Me.. Happy new year to me.

Village Girl

....I Have this need to tell you

...Took the hand of a preacher man and we made love in the sun. But I ran out of places and friendly faces because i had to be free...

Charlene's  Never Been to Me seems to have refused to leave my head. Keeps playing morning, noon, night and early morning. I would like to say I don't know why it keeps playing, replaying and re-replaying but I think.. now I know why.

Hi there, it's been a while since I last came here all rants and others. Not that I've been to much good but quite a few things have happened. Between trying to take Wena off the ground to actually walking her-I got myself into some mischief.

Before you scroll down looking for the paragraph where I talk about my drinking binges, late nights out, emotional spills even some very shameful drunken acts, please read this next line...

Mauryn learnt how to keep quiet.

Yes, that all elusive Virtue called Submission finally found me. Hit me so hard, I had to submit to it... Boy oh boy!!! Not one of the easiest things to do or subscribe to but, I am enjoying my submissive moments. 

Wait a minute, does ignoring annoying remarks by even more annoying people qualify to be called Submission? Well, I'd like to think so. 

These days, I actually shut up, listen and accept everything I am told. Who knew? Who knew that I would spend 45 days without even thinking anything alcoholic (4 days shy of 45- but considering my current situation, doubt alcohol will be accessible)

Now that I've gone and all bragged about my new found ability not to verbally re-butt, let's share some of these million lies I've been living.

Listening to Charlene (did i say it's on repeat?) She talks about : How she has been undressed by kings and seen some things that a woman aint supposed to see...and I relate. 

I've lived in fantasy land for so long I many a time envisage myself as the girl who gets picked up by a hot dude and get driven to some fancy named restaurant, waited on by 5 people and at the end of the evening, My Dude takes me to the movies-where some romantic story is showing and after drives me home.

Home is a nicely done apartment with lights and a music system that senses and responds to my moods. Dude kisses me, opens my apartment door, kisses me again and bids me goodnight. 

Soon as the door closes behind Dude, Whitney Houston's I will always love you comes on as I throw my shawl and drop everything. Walk into my bathroom, and come out to the phone ringing, -It's my Dude calling me to tell me he has failed to get out of my drive way. He's been sitting in his car unable to forget my dazzling smile and the eloquent conversation we had over dinner. Or he just can't forget how great a kisser I am...

(some mushy mushy song comes on)

I ask him to come back up... John Legend's All of Me comes on as I open the door for him..........................

"Mummy!!! Micah has bite me!!!" Wakes me up from my dream!!! Well, Truth be told, I am a mother of many who keep fighting, biting, pinching, breaking bowls and flasks- not to forget my unopened wine bottle (which meanwhile was my gateway to my fantasy land)... Now that is reality.

Gotta go attend to someone before the ka Decoder is shredded!! someone wants JimJam and another wants something else!!!

Hey, you know what paradise is?

It's a lie, a fantasy we create about

People and places as we'd like them to be

But you know what truth is?

It's that little baby you're holding

It's that man you fought with this morning

The same one you're going to make love with tonight

That's truth, that's love

Until the next dream....

......................................

Village Girl, Mo

PS: It would not hurt if you actually visited  Wena 

Micah the Chief Tyrant taking my Picture